monkey passion

GC told me his ex had depressions and that it was tiresome to be with her during those phases. I know that. I know it's hard to cope with a person being that way and not being able to do anything against it and having to deal with them on a daily basis anyway. I know that.
And yet it makes me worry. What if I have a relapse? I'm petrified. First of all because I - for obvious reasons - hate it. And secondly because I don't want to lose him. I don't want him to get tired of me. Being cyclothymic isn't easy. In fact, it's fucking hell. But being scared of losing people dear to me because I'm a damn nuisance during the depressive phase is even worse.
I've decided to call my psychotwat in case it happens. I've been getting the signs all last week, they stopped on Friday but that doesn't mean I don't have to be careful. I also need to tell my prefect; another thing I'm dreading. I mean, they know about my condition, but that doesn't mean it's easy to talk about.

On a happier note, GC's friends seem to like me. I like them, too. They're a cool bunch of people. They have the right kind of humor, fun to be around, intelligent... I just like them :)
We went drinking yesterday. GC also shows another side of him when he's with them. You know, a bit childish, crazy... Like me when I'm around LR and TF. He laughs a lot when he's with them. And I enjoy seeing him like that.
He needs to meet LR. I think she'll accept him once she gets to know him. She still a bit skeptical and doesn't seem to believe that it'll last long. Not that I blame her. My past relationships haven't exactly been fruitful. But maybe, just maybe, this is different. I certainly hope so. I feel at home whenever I'm with him. And that means a lot already.

/P.