I thought he'd be more cool and distanced because for some sick reason I have been taught by experience that some guys (cough S cough) don't seem to deem me worthy enough to be seen beside them in public. Well, note to self: I AM fucking worthy. And I am not something to be ashamed of. I'm moderately popular, I look pretty good when I want to, I am likeable. Bloody hell yeah I'm worthy. It just took me a while for it to actually sink in, is all. And that's sad. Not because I want to wallow in self-pity (again). But because I'm not the only one. I think it's fair to say that quite a few girls/women know what it means to be a 'dirty little secret' of some guy who thinks going out with us in public will harm his prestige/ image/ popularity/ whatever. If he puts you in the secret-zone, dump him. Now. It's not worth it.
Anyway, I'm happy. And it feels wonderful to be happy.
Maybe because I'm starting to feel like I can trust him. Trust is important. I need that kind of closeness.
/P.
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