The Last Time

"Those people aren't happy. You only kiss like that when you know that kiss is your last."

This made me think.

On our last evening together, D and I kissed exactly the same way. It felt like the last time. It was the last time. At that moment I thought it was because I'd have to wait for a whole year to see him again. Now, when I think back, maybe it was because I knew we'd never manage to stay together. We still are what you could call a couple, but its just no the same. I miss him like hell. He doesn't even consider me to be worth enough to write to me, let alone call.

He's a good kisser. That's what I thought. But it didn't feel fulfilling. He was so tender, so soft... too tender. The less he gave, the more I wanted.

Me: Kiss me, damn it, like you mean it! Or I'll break apart!

D: If I kiss you like I mean it, you might just disappear...

Two different thoughts.

Why did it have to be like that?

/P.