Vacations have started, and I don't really know where to start... Everything is happening so fast. I'm not really sure what's going on, but it seems like there actually is a person that loves me (he says). The problem is: I don't know if the feeling is mutual. I want him, for sure, but I'm not sure about the loving part. And now that I have him and he's mine, he doesn't seem so wantable anymore. That's my problem; I like something as long as it's not mine, but when I have it I lose interest with time. If he doesn't let me know he's alive and remembers that I exist by tomorrow I really might lose interest already. The fate of every boy who wants me or wants me to want him is always the same: Never tire to get my attention, do something special, do something new just for me, show me that you like me, show me your feelings, or I'll forget you and the fact that you actually exist. My bad, sorry. I'm seriously gonna lose every guy in my life by acting this way. But I'm a girl, after all. I don't want to be taken for granted, I have my thoughts and feelings, and these thoughts and feelings might be directed at a boy for some time, but as soon as he takes them for granted and starts doing things that hurt me just to prove to himself that I won't leave him despite everything, then I get angry. And then it's the end. My bad, not sorry.
What to do? After writing so much nefgative stuff, I like him after all. I like him, I confess, even if he can be a jerk. Even if it's obvious at times that he's more after my body then after myself as just me. You all deserve a million bucks if you are stupid enough not to know who I'm talking about yet. ;) And hush, hush, not a word to anyone, it's a secret ^^ Let me get used to it, let me see how it'll work out, then I'll make all this public. But not just yet. Not now.
Love y'all :*
pxy
PS: I might not update for some time, I'm off to Rome :)
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