An Ode To Friendship

Because of the incident with Gregory I've been thinking of my relationship with my friends. Do I spend enough time with them or do I neglect some friendships? My friends in Poland for example: Although I promised I would I don't write too many Mails to them, so now I wrote to each and every one of them. I miss them, even though Switzerland is more of a home to me than Poland, I really really miss everything and everyone there. Except the roads. Ghastly. Most of all, sometimes more than father and K, I miss Sophia and D, meaning Darek.

Sophia is one of my oldest, very best friends who knows everything about me and always knows what I'm thinking before I even got the idea of thinking it. My cool Soul Sistah; on her birthday last year I called the radio so they played Hey Soul Sister by Train, her favorite song back then, five times in a row. :) She was so embarassed when they said her name in the radio, her face looked like a tomato ^^
Alas, Sophia is a very naive person; she always lets people use her, especially boys. I've never met a person who broke up with her boyfriend more times than her in two weeks, and it was the same one. I've never met a girl before who's had so many boyfriends, either. And every time she's broken up or found a new guy she calls me or mails me and tells me what a jerk or how sweet and nice he is. I've gotten used to it, but it makes me worry about her future. A lively girl like her should be happy and settled with one guy and not with five in a month. But who am I to criticize her; I can't even say no to the biggest slut in class. Oh dear, what a nuisance to be gullible. And kind. I should start hating everybody, it would be easier.

Darek on the other hand is a very special person. Like Sophia, I've known him for more than seven years now, which is quite a bit. Kind of my soul mate number two. I think he's more number one because I've known him him longer that Gregory and he knows so much about me that either he is my lost twin brother or he has telepathic abilities, because sometimes he tells me things about myself that not even my diary knows (knew, I don't write one anymore). K always says that if you hit one of us, the other will feel pain, and if one of us laughs, the other feels happy, too, no matter how big the distance is between us. That's cute and kinda cool.
One important thing about my relationship with Darek is that I love him. It's not love like in going out or marrying, I love him as a very important, very dear friend. I love him, but I'm not in love with him. Many people mistake us for a couple when they see us, though. It's because we sometimes hold hands and swing them around like little children or I kiss him on the cheek or he kisses me on the forehead or something like that; small, tender things done between brother and sister. With Darek I would travel to the end of th world and back, jump down the Niagara Falls and climb Mount Everest, I couldn't care less how dangerous it is. I guess that's what you call blind trust in a person. I love it that i can be myself around him, I can be childish or silly or hysterical or crazy or whiny or bad-tempered and he will still stay by my side and talk to me and be childish or hysterical or crazy or something with me. That's what I love about him. He's such a dear.

Friends should be cherished, they are all we've got. Parents can be a nuisance, Lovers, come and go, but friends always stay-as long as they are true friends.There is a proverb saying: "The only unsinkable ship is friendship."
I hope I have a lot of friends, some good ones, some shallow ones, but no enemies. I hope I can call my class my friends, not because I know them well or share their secrets, but because I like them all, despite everything. E, for example; I don't want her to hate me for going out with a guy she hates in turn. I usually follow the advice of friends regarding relationships, because they see more than me, who am blind, but this time I want to take the risk. I regard E as my friend. I hope it's mutual. :)

Thus ends my ode to friendship, which is actually an ode to two particular friends.

xxx :*
pxy

PS: I installed this reactions-thing you can mark, just so I can get a feedback on my work ;)

Soul Mate

Gregory just gave a sign of life after over three months of silence. He wrote me an E-Mail and then called me, explaining. It seems that he's been in a clinic for two months now. Because he tried to kill himself.

Gregory is what you could call my first true love. We went out for like two and a half weeks and then had a long distance relationship because I chose not to go to boarding school after all (we met at the school while I was there for three mock weeks). After some time we broke up and stayed good friends. One day he called me and told me he was gay. That was about three years ago now. He found himself a boyfriend, Dima, which was quite risky; the boarding school is strictly catholic. They were happy, and I used to feel a tinge of envy when I saw them together at first, preferring to talk to Gregory alone because otherwise he was too distracted. I never liked Dima too much. You could say we tolerated each other for Gregory's sake. I never actually talked to him properly, except once, when it was his Birthday and I asked him how things were; we talked for like an hour and it wasn't so bad; we parted friendlily, but it was just shallow friendliness. I stayed in contact with Gregory till now, meeting up with him from time to time during the holidays, otherwise calling or smsing. Then suddenly he went silent. Now, 48 minutes ago, he called me telling me he was in a clinic and that's the reason he never wrote. He sounded so steady when he said: "It's because I cut my wrist, you know. They wouldn't understand, P, they made stay put here." I'm still quite shaken. He is something like my soul mate. He would cry for me when I was sad and if he fell down the stairs, I'd feel sick. What makes me feel sick now is that I didn't sense it when he didn't feel well. I didn't realize he was so badly off, he lied so well. He would smile and say he was tired or had had a bad test or something random and I'd believe him. Now he tells me he wanted to commit suicide.

I just called his Mom. She blames herself because she hadn't been able to keep him from harm. She said that if she had taken him seriously for once he would have been okay. She had always hoped he would open his eyes one day and be straight again and find himself a girlfriend, "someone decent".She could never understand that being homosexual is what Gregory is, and that won't ever change. No grandchildren for her.

So here I am spilling my thoughts onto my keyboard, typing all this. I think I have to sleep, but I'm not sure I've gathered myself enough to sleep now. What I need in such moments is T. T always finds a way to cheer me up. Why can't the world be a happier place than it is now?

If Gregory ever succeeds in killing himself, he'll definitely go to heaven. Even if suicide is an unforgivable sin.

Roma Amor

Haaah... I'm back from Rome. It was... awesome? great? wonderful? hot? impressing? everything, I guess. Rome, in la bella Italia, the city of tasty pizzas, busses with absolutely no amortization whatsoever, filthy metros, magnificentz monuments, an ancient air around it and hot tour guides. Yes I'm allowed to say that. I can't believe you can be like seventeen-eighteen and work for some tourict agency, but it's true and I'm happy about that. The other four bitches were hitting on him so badly I wanted to kill them but oh well father would have banished me from the hotties surroundings, so I didn't. So I restricted myself to gaping at him shamelessly (which earned me fathers eyes shooting daggers in my back) and eyeing the bitches like pieces of very old, very smelly trash, (which earned me a thankful smile from the hottie).
I made lots and lots of photos of everything I could make a photo of (except Mr Hotness, sadly, for certain reasons - hint: father, murder, apocalipse, etc) :)
I think I put on weight from all the pizzas I ate, they're so good you could live on them!
Jeez, time's up, gotta go ;)
xxx
pxy

Because I'm A Girl

Vacations have started, and I don't really know where to start... Everything is happening so fast. I'm not really sure what's going on, but it seems like there actually is a person that loves me (he says). The problem is: I don't know if the feeling is mutual. I want him, for sure, but I'm not sure about the loving part. And now that I have him and he's mine, he doesn't seem so wantable anymore. That's my problem; I like something as long as it's not mine, but when I have it I lose interest with time. If he doesn't let me know he's alive and remembers that I exist by tomorrow I really might lose interest already. The fate of every boy who wants me or wants me to want him is always the same: Never tire to get my attention, do something special, do something new just for me, show me that you like me, show me your feelings, or I'll forget you and the fact that you actually exist. My bad, sorry. I'm seriously gonna lose every guy in my life by acting this way. But I'm a girl, after all. I don't want to be taken for granted, I have my thoughts and feelings, and these thoughts and feelings might be directed at a boy for some time, but as soon as he takes them for granted and starts doing things that hurt me just to prove to himself that I won't leave him despite everything, then I get angry. And then it's the end. My bad, not sorry.
What to do? After writing so much nefgative stuff, I like him after all. I like him, I confess, even if he can be a jerk. Even if it's obvious at times that he's more after my body then after myself as just me. You all deserve a million bucks if you are stupid enough not to know who I'm talking about yet. ;) And hush, hush, not a word to anyone, it's a secret ^^ Let me get used to it, let me see how it'll work out, then I'll make all this public. But not just yet. Not now.

Love y'all :*
                           pxy

PS: I might not update for some time, I'm off to Rome :)

Paranoia And My Conscience Going Mad

Just now life sucked real bad. A certain somebody sat next to me during lessons today, constantly sending vibes telling me clearly something I didn't wanna know. Later I went shopping for tomorrow (excursion with class) with L and that person (I'm sure you all know whom I mean) and... S started... doing things. Things I don't want him doing. Like walking/standing reeeally close to me, caressing my cheek and other wow-that-makes-me-feel-no-wait-I-don't-want-him-stop-please-thoughts-causing things. I seriously didn't know what to do, I tried walking fast and a lot, turning around randomly walking in the opposite direction... nothing helped. Agh! Later I was walking down towards the market place with that certain somebody when he put his arm around me and yeah well he tried to kiss me. I panicked. I. Seriously. Freaked. Out. I don't think I've ever rejected a person so obviously before. And what happens? He pretends to be hurt but otherwise acts as if nothing had happened. Like, what the hell? I thought his ego was too big to endure such a failure (haha yeah think highly of myself ;D)... Okay does that mean he's serious or just that he likes a challenge?? Whatever. He may just as well give up now. No way am I gonna do anything with him. I mean really! Asking me if he could come to my place today! Hah! Sorry mate, you're so not my league... go find something rather lower than mine, something nearer to your place. In the cellar. There. I got all my frustration and anger out, so that's it. I hate him so badly.
Aaaah and it makes my conscience go mad because I have to think of D and him thinking I still love him but I only see him as a really really good friend that could be more than just a friend if he were at least somewhere near me but oh my god what have I done this is so bad life sucks!
...........
Anyway so I watched Prince of Persia (omg what a random subject). It's a cool film, but kinda too fast to get over the message completely. I especially liked the words at the end of the film:

"It is said some lives

Are linked across time

Connected by an ancient calling

That echoes through the ages..."

So beautiful :) Really poetic :)


:* pxy

Just Wondering

The most asked question of girls who saw this picture:

Why don't all of them look like this??? Seriously, why aren't there any more of hotties like this one here around? And if they are, why aren't the available?!
Okay. So anyway, check out his films (Spam!! :O) he's worth it ;) <3
:* pxy

Realization

Okay that sucked :P

:* pxy

Treasures

Well, yesterday was fun. I burnt our pizzas, ruined mine by putting too much aceto balsamico onto my plate and watched a film without really knowing what I was actually watching because of two much more interesting persons next to me laughing their heads off at... nothing. I mean it couldn't be the film - it was a drama - and there was absolutely nothing funny in the room. I think I gave them too much sugar. T and L, that is. Oh well. But is was fun. Really. Made me forget all trouble. That is one thing I love my best friends for; they easily distract me from anything negative - when we're together, I'm just happy. Which makes friendship so precious that I cannot name an equal treasure. Friendship is stronger than love, stronger than hate and deceit. Friendship is the one thing I see worth the risk and trouble getting.
Another treasure is life itself. It may seem hopeless and unfair at times, but then you remember all the good things in the past, things, wonders that may come in the future. Motivations to move on, to live. Breathing in air is not living. Breathing in emotions, happenings, surroundings, feeling them under one's skin, that is living.
A man once wanted to jump off a bridge, when his phone called. It was his wife telling him that she was pregnant. The man broke down, crying. A passer by asked him why he was sad. The man said: "Here I was, wanting to die. But I had forgotten about my wife at home, our future together, our child. In my despair I only saw my pain, not the happiness of others." The passer by answered: "It is the happiness of others that makes us remember our place in life. Go home, to your wife, let her share her happiness with you. May you two be blessed." He walked off. After the birth of his child, the man wanted to find the passer by to thank him. He found him in a graveyard, his name carved into a stone. The woman standing in front of the grave with her child told him he had killed himself while she had been pregnant five years ago. He had never lived to see the baby. The man went home in silence, and he never forgot the day a ghost had saved him from a fate he would have regretted into eternity.
You guys out there, value and treasure your life, and never think of giving up. No matter how hard it may be, always hope for better times, and to see that hope fulfilled, do something to accomplish a better world!

xoxo, pxy

Evening Hysteria

My brother's gone missing. Again. He was supposed to be home at four o'clock, and now it's like nearly eight. This is too much. T said she'd come over ASAP, so I'm waiting, wondering where that sunnuvabitch is now. Ffs, why does he have to do this kind of things?!

Okay, he came back half past nine. Wonderful. My Gran almost got a heart-attack and Mum was worried silly back in India. He's totally fucked up now. I can't imagine what they'll do to punish him... (Yes, that is a tinge of spitefulness in my voice)

T was a great help, I just love her for being there for me whenever I need her. Tomorrow's gonna be a cool day, especially the evening --> dinner and a film with T and L (yay!) to distract me from my cute little pest of a brother (who, I admit it, made me very worried). I can't decide what sort of calorie bomb we'll eat... Monster-Pizza or tons of chips? Popcorn? Sweets? Definitely sweets. And coke. Hooray I can't wait until tomorrow. Haha I bet tomorrow I'll be like omg please God make this day end, and fast! ^-^


Enough for today, I'm tired. Jeez I gotta get some sleep. It's so annoying to make-over the rings under my eyes in the morning :/
xoxo, pxy

Adorable Awesomeness

Just found these two adorable little babies... Mum sent them to me last year in a virtual easter card... Aren't they absolutely cute??? <3 xoxo, pxy    :*

A Humble Poem

Well, since I'm bored senseless right now (with no partying and stuff) I've started randomly ransacking my brain for anything distracting and... here's what I conjured up: A poem! Strict copyright by me. Of course. In memory of the old utopia the world used to be. ... ... I'm getting the feeling that I've taken all the seriousness from my beautiful piece of art (yeah right). Here we go:

Silent Memories

A book on the floor

Filled with words

Telling the story

Of many a world

Written with ink

Black as the sky

Pages of ash

Grey like the snow

Outside it's dark

Not a breath drawn

Ashen dunes dance

Mysteriously moving

No wind, no sound

A lonely house stands

In the house

Held by a ghost

Floats a book

Found by a child

Turning the pages

The little ghost smiles

Remembering times

When blue was the sky

And white was the snow

Once upon a time...

Contradictions

Feels like I haven't been here for ages.... I kinda missed this little place of truth :)
My Grandma's here until Wednesday, which means no fun, no going out 'til late, no drinking, no nothing. Sad, isn't it? Oh well, at least I got to do some shopping while I sent her off to the botanic garden... The only place one can send her to without any whining or suspicions. You know I was sent to her for a week when I was seven to learn manners from her? I had to sit at a table and name all the different sorts of forks and knives and bowls and plates and ugh it was terrible! But now I'm praised for my good manners at table and my way of acting in "good society". I mean really, I'm not exactly going to be an heiress of any kind or princess two hundred years ago who would actually need this kind of education. It's all about money and power now. Who cares how old the perverted geezer is who's looking at you lustily all the time?? As long as he has enough money to buy you a house and some new clothes, it's okay. Anything you wish, Mister Rich. Seriously. What the hell?! I mean look at all those girls, barely over twenty, walking around with seventy-year-olds with absolutely no hair on their heads and no abilities in bed whatsoever and sometimes maybe even total weirdos. Ugh. Gross. I don't understand how one can be so desperate.
Mum always tells me: If you meet a man who makes you think he's the man of your dreams and he'll make you happy for sure, then check his wallet fast. If it's full; lucky girl, he's your man! But if it's empty; hard luck honey, look for someone else. It's brutal, yes, but in a way true. I don't think I still believe in true love anymore. It's all about sex and money now. If I ever meet a couple that has stayed true to one another for all it's life, not once thinking of a better would-have-been-future, not once looking at another woman/man, not once doubting the other, then I will, I swear this, believe and spend the rest of my life in a lonely apartment regretting my mistake in earlier life, ruining it irreversibly. There.
Father once told me: If it is true love, then nothing will be able to stop it or force the feeling to falter. Trust and Loyalty are the key to a healthy and long relationship. Funny that Mum and Father divorced, isn't it? They had both gone against their word, and here they are, regretting. The two counsels are so different and contradicting... Which should I follow? Which should I deny? The time will come when I'll have to know the answer. Money makes the world go round... But what would we do without love?
xoxo, pxy

PS: So sorry for the cliffy atmosphere... just had to.. go with the flow, I was in the mood. Sentimental stuff and so on. Ya know. :*

Newzzz

I got a new haircut! :D Me ish pwowd ^-^ Actually one side is a little weird but it'll be okay in a few days. Hopefully.
Yay I'm going to a good friends place for dinner <3 Gonna be so much fun xD No I'm not hooking up with him. He's gay. And 30. But cute. And my Moms BF. So there, no fun for me this time...
Guess I gotta go... update might follow, not sure yet. ;)
xoxo, pxy

Obsession

I am officially obsessed. With men. Not any men. The men. Alex P., Jake G., Hayden C., Craig H. and Show Lo. This is... bad. Badbadbad. No way I'm gonna be able to concentrate on school. 'Kay, off to watch LotS... Did you know the first thing you see of Craig Horner is his magnificent abs? I did. That's why I watch the series ;) Byeee ^o^
xoxo, pxy

Addition

OMG I just remembered! I ran into the guy I hooked up with on T's party today! He was like so shocked to see me... especially awkward situation, 'cause I haven't seen him ever since the party. Not that I regret it, it's bothersome to meet up with a one-night-stand; you don't know what to say. It was totally awkward for me though because I know something S told me about him... which I will not say here, because it's too big a secret to tell it, even in a blog. (No, absolutely no chances of convincing me to spill it!) Although I don't even know if it's true... Anything coming from S is a potential lie, anyway. And this is the truth, not a thing to say just to make him look bad. Seriously.
xoxo, pxy

Gossip over a bowl of Strawberries

Time for a new update!
Today I'm gonna get right to the point, without any beating the bush. S was the jerk today (as always). And I know I sound like I'm obsessed with him, and I know that I shouldn't be doing this, but anyway, here goes: During German lessons yesterday, I caught S totally hitting on a girl in my class. I was, like, omg not again, because he had done exactly the same thing with me, L, and another girl who told me (no names, not even to you, E). That is so not okay! I mean if he's so desperate in getting a girl, why doesn't he go to a fucking night club??? My ex did that when I broke up with him, there's nothing bad about getting oneself a slut who'll do the job, but please, it's not right to hit on every single girl available! Especially the nice ones that deserve better. I know, this is so turning into a rant about S. Actually I don't care. So anyway. Hey am I the only one feeling that I'm kinda turning into a stalker or something? I mean as long as I don't observe everything he does or who he talks to etc it's alright.  ...Right? Haha jk nah I'm definitely not a stalker. I was actually just picking up something from the floor when I saw what S was doing under the table. No, this is not what you're thinking. I'd be too shocked if it had been that. xD
Toootally fucked up my Maths test. I guess I'll never manage to do a Maths test without a blackout. :/
D hasn't written for so long! I miss everybody so much... Next time he writes I'm ginna make him wait too. There. I'm pouting. ;3 (<-- yep that's a face)
Oh yeah: It's strawberry season again!!! Happyyyy!!! Lovelovelovelovelove strawberries... <3
Kay, I'm finished. See ya some time soon ;)
xoxo, pxy

Tinnitus, Tears, Toffees and my Teddy

Sooo after discovering that E has started to read my blog I decided to explore hers... Fuuun! Now I'll have to be careful as to what I write... ;)
So anyway (I really seem to like this word...) I finished my essay! I'm off to watch TV. No more work for now. Meaning for the next two hours. Then comes the time for Maths. Seriously I hatehatehate my teachers so badly for making us poor students work to death two weeks before the holidays... But Z and D are even worse off... Can you believe it that they have 8 tests in one week?? Jeez... But I'm so happy the holidays are starting soon! I'm going to Rome... Father said he'd like me to write a list of places I wanna see but to be honest I'm not too keen on going there. Especially because Mum wanted to go with me first. I know this is precisely what Mum wanted to happen; me distancing myself from father, but anyway I kinda don't care... Whatever (another favourite word). T is bombarding me with her sorrows right now; something about her Latin. I don't understand her. I  mean, okay, I know she has Tinnitus, but she doesn't have to remind me every single time she talks to me. Although I know better, she seems to like people feeling sorry for her. She doesn't need that. Everybody likes her anyway! I hate people trying to win other people's sympathy and friendship by making them feel pity. It's just not right. And yes, I'm kinda pissed. Why can't she just stop moaning and crying over herself and get started with work? If she can't concentrate, she shouldn't be on fb chatting. If her ears hurt, she shouldn't be listening to music right now. I'm surprised at how easily I can just switch from concerned to angry... must be the hormones. My Mum just entered menopause and she too is crying over a box of toffees and complaining that she's getting fat. Well, she is. But I don't think it really matters. She's beautiful all the same - in her own way. Being fat doesn't mean being ugly and unattractive. Of course a woman the size of a walrus isn't attractive, but that's not exactly hat I  meant.
I found my old Teddy. I got him when I was two, and I lost him when I was twelve. He just disappeared. Today I was cleaning up my room when I hit something soft with the vacuum cleaner: my Teddy!!! He was all covered with dust, which was actually totally gross, but I totally lost it and started running around the house with this piece of furry stuff in my arms. A (my little brother, forgot to mention him too... no surprise though) gave me that look that makes you think that you're completely loopy (which I was). Shane Dawson is loopy. Craig Horner is hot. Roses are red. Or white. Or yellow. I'm getting confused. Whatever (again!). I think I'm going to have to tell E that she's definitely not less attractive than pink fluffy things called party bitches. A bitch is always ugly, no matter how much make-up she plasters on her face; they're all empty. E is everything but empty; she has feelings, she has a character of her own. Remember girls, always be yourself; it makes you attractive! Remember guys, never judge a girl by appearances; there's always something more to her than it seems! And S is a jerk. But D isn't. Which doesn't excuse him for not writing to me for two days. xoxo, pxy

Pizza, Crispies and Other Random Things

So I'm sitting around, not knowing what to do, trying to complete an essay... And just look what's happened! I'm writing my blog. WHY?! Stupid essay. It's about methyl mercury in fish. Honestly, I don't know why the hell I chose such a subject in the first place... But the pizza was good.
I'm doing the worst thing  desperate girls  tend to do: I'm doing whatever my Rice Crispies tell me to. I don't even have Rice Crispies, I'm just so booored....
But yes, I am desperate. And I'm stupid. It's a fact that if a guy flatters you enough and smells really good then you fall for him even if it's totally obvious that he's playing you. Guess who is being played. Bingo. And on top of that S actually had the balls to go to L and flirt with her! Of course she told me right away (such a sweetheart!) and now I hate S even more, but his smell is just, like, infatuating. Jeez I'm starting to sound like that dude from Twilight... Never mind. Hell yes I'm done for. Totally. Inexplicably. Worst thing is I can hear my conscience pinching me at the back of my head saying "Now, now, what about D? Didn't you say just yesterday that you really really liked him? You know you can't let him down now...." Which of course makes me feel even worse than before. D is such a good guy. He's honest, kind, charismatic but cute, he's the kind of guy you could tell everything. S on the other hand is nice, looks good enough for me to be able to show my face around him without being a total moron, smells good, and - worst of all - he totally turns me on at times. It's that stupid aftershave he uses... I'm gonna break into his house one fine day and destroy every single bottle of that fucking aftershave that drives me nuts. And yes I'm absolutely not happy about being turned on by a guy who flirts with every girl that is willing to talk to him. Seriously, how can guys just think about sex, sex, sex all the time? Okay, I do too... Sometimes. I told LinLin (forgot to mention her; BF who moved away) about it, and she told me he's a total asshole, and I know that, but... ah never mind, never mind.
I gotta finish that essay! I really really gotta finish it. And I'm still here. What am I doing here in the first place... Whatever. xoxo, pxy

Greetings

What's important to know about me before we get started:
I like laughing which makes people sometimes think they can't take me seriously. But believe me, I can be serious. Although I don't have much self-esteem, I have to say that my talent is listening to people. And drawing. But I like listening because it makes people that come to me with their problems feel better, so I'm happy to be of some help. Which would mean that I'm a philantropist.
I live in a small city, have a small bunch of friends and live in small room. My room is my world. It's not like I'm a nerd who sits in her room all day in front of her laptop, I just like to call my room "My Little World" because I think It's an image of myself; chaotic, colourful, warm, crammed up with all sorts of things... Kinda like my head (not my hair, mind you^^). Which would mean that I'm the type of girl that doesn't stand out from the crowd.
I don't like people lying to me. I've experienced the pain that a lie can cause you so I don't lie myself (except to a certain person who won't let me out of the house unless I swear a hundred things). I mean seriously, why can't Mom just quit treating me as if I was two? Okay this is changing into a childish rant about parents. Nope, I won't be ranting about my family. Except my brother. He deserves it. Because honestly, who steals from a shop just because his buddies said it was cool? For fucks sake (excuse my French), he's only twelve!!!
Aaaanyways.
Since my blog is going to revolve around my little world - I'm starting to wonder why I didn't call my blog that way - The following characters are going to appear:
-L, my very best friend
-T, my very best friend too
-E, a good friend from class
-S, the guy who makes me crazy (for various reasons)
-D, the guy abroad I have a permanent crush on
-Z, my best friend abroad
-Mum, my mom
-father, my dad
-K, my kinda-sister-but-not-really-actually-i-dont-know-what-she-is
They are essential to my story. Oh yeah and if you think my blog might sound a little overdone; it isn't. Three years ago, I wouldn't have dreamed of having this kind of life! It's so... warped up and complicated. I don't even know how it started. Aaaand another thing: yes, I can be hyperactive, yes, I have my depressions, yes, I'm weird and no, I definitely don't own gay goats. Adrien Brody had a pair of them though. A word of advice  for the end: however loopy I may seem, I'm just a plain, nearly 16-year old girl with too much fantasy to be healthy. xoxo