Dilemna

"I just came back from Woodstock and I've thought for a long time if I should write and most of all how to start so maybe I'll just start like this:

I'm sorry that everything happened the way it did this year, I heard that you're not allowed to be in contact with me or Zosia. I hope that next year it'll be better.

Now the second matter: I know I was wrong not to tell you about the way I feel on the first day but I just couldn't, I thought it would be better for us, it would be better if you'd just find someone better who'll be nearer and who'll be a better guy than me. It's not like I want it but it's the best solution.

I hope I haven't made you even more upset with this e-mail but I felt I should write it and, well, after two hours of sitting and pondering over what to write I just have.

I hope you understand. If you want everything to be as it was then write back, if you don't the it's okay. Delete everything and forget about me."

Just got this. And honestly I have mixed feelings about it. Should I write back? Or should I just put an end to all we've been through - all I've been through? The second solution sounds better on the long run, but right now I have no idea what to do. I guess I still love him. It's not so easy to forget. I may try to be confident, but something like what was between us can't just be forgotten and left behind. At least I can't do it. I'm too scared to.

What should I do?

/P.